Crimson Regret
by Canadian Phil
Summary: VIVA LA BAM. Ryan get caught. SLASH.


Glomb sat on the bathroom floor, his head buried in his hands. Ryan sat on the edge of the bathtub, mortified.

"Why?" Tim asked his friend, tears streaming down his face.

Ryan looked down at his feet, unable to make eye contact. He shifted his gaze up to his bare thigh, the Crimson Regret spilling out, falling in drops onto the ground.

"I don't know why." Ry mumbled.

Tim finally stood up and grabbed a towel off of the hanger. He wrapped it tenderly around Ryan's bleeding appendage. The tears fell fast from his eyes, soaking the towel in tears before blood.

"I'm sorry…" Ryan's voice trailed off.

Tim started sobbing, loudly. He wrapped his arms around Ryan's neck and cried into his shoulder.

"I'm so sorry Tim…I-I don't know…I mean, why I…" Ryan's voice trailed off as he started crying. He could never EVER stand to see his friend upset like this; it was worse knowing that he had caused it.

"Bam told me you were…not…straight." Glomb hated the word 'gay'. It seemed so negative to him.

"That's why I don't tell Bam ANYTHING nowadays." Ryan's face reddened, but for some reason he didn't feel ashamed.

"Dude, is that why…why you're doing this to yourself?"

"Angie." Ryan whispered, looking at the blood spotted floor. Glomb's face grew hot with anger.

"That fucking CUNT! What did she do to you now?" Tim wrapped a protective arm around Ry's waist, pulling him to his feet.

"She's just really controlling and I'm sort of sick of it."

"So you're mutilating yourself?"

"Seemed like a better idea an hour ago."

"Ryan, why are you still with her? Do you love her?"

"No."

"Leave her then." Glomb sat Ryan on his bed.

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"She's the only pussy I've got right now."

"You don't even LIKE girls, dude." Glomb pointed out, Ryan's face growing even more red.

"I know."

"Ry, leave her. You can crash at my place if you want." Tim's eyes were serious.

"I can't do that!"

"Sure you can. I don't mind houseguests." Glomb tried to make a joke, but Ryan just gritted his teeth.

"That's not what I meant." Ry glared at Tim, pressing the towel harder against his leg.

"Then what did you mean?"

"I don't know…I just can't."

"Ryan-"

"I CAN'T OK!?"

"OK! Fuck Ryan, I'm trying to HELP you here!"

"I DON'T NEED YOUR FUCKING HELP!" Ryan stood up and hobbled towards the door.

"Ryan! STOP!

"NO!"

"WHAT THE FUCKING HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!" Tim's voice rose to an odd high-pitched, quivery state.

"NOTHING! Just LEAVE ME ALONE!"

Glomb crumpled to the floor, leaned against the wall, and burst into tears. He curled up into a ball, propping his head on top of his arms, which now rested on his knees. Glomb's body shook violently with each sob. His crying grew so loud, he didn't hear Ryan step back into the bathroom.

"Tim? Tim, I'm sorry."

"Go."

"What? Dude, ten minutes ago you were begging me not to."

"You were right, you're always right. Go."

Ryan sat beside Glomb and wrapped his arms around him. Glomb transferred his head from his own arms onto Ryan's shoulder. Glomb's tears had subsided, but his body was still wracked with sobs.

"Shhh. It's ok."

"No it's NOT!"

"Glomb, it's fine! Really. I was being stupid. For years I've just been slicing my self just to deal with my fucking problems…I've just never been caught before." Ryan closed his eyes and held Glomb tighter.

"Why?" Glomb sniffled.

"It seemed easier than sharing feelings and shit." Ryan looked down at Glomb's tousled hair.

"I love you, Ry."

"Thanks buddy. I love you too."

"No, Ryan. I love you." Glomb's voice shook.

"What do you mean?"

"I love you, I'm in love with you, and you doing this bullshit to yourself is making me sick to my fucking stomach. You're with a girl that's making you miserable and..." Tim's voice trailed off, a heavy silence sat in the air.

"Stop fucking with me." Ryan's hoarse voice cracked.

Glomb lifted his head up and looked solemnly into Ryan's eyes. All the hurt, pain and frustration in Ryan melted away when he saw that look.

"You're…not…fucking with me, are you?" Ryan spoke slowly.

Glomb removed all doubt with a lingering kiss. Ryan looked deeper into Glomb's eyes.

"Can you promise me you won't ever do this shit again?" Glomb's voice was hopeful, and encouraging.

"No, I can't."

"Why?" Glomb's lip quivered again.

"I would never promise you something, unless beyond a SHADOW OF A FUCKING DOUBT I know I would never do it again. I can't promise that I'll never cut myself again."

"What would ever make you cut yourself again?" Glomb started quietly crying again.

Ryan smiled and kissed Glomb deeply.

"If you ever left."

"If I ever left where?"

"If you ever left me." Ryan's eyes met up with Tim's once more as the two shared a tender kiss.


End file.
